Piranha DD (2012)
Review by George Elcombe
‘Take that, laughing diarrhoea baby’
I’ll be honest: I didn’t see
piranha 3D (2010). That film looked fun, had girls in bikinis, gore, Ving Rhames
kicking aquatic ass and Kelly Brook. All in glorious 3D! But alas, I missed it
in the cinema and just haven’t gotten around to watching it yet. But I am a fan
of intentional B movies that are just made for the sole purpose of being fun
for the audience. These films don’t win any big awards but are loved by
audience who don’t take cinema as seriously as the rest (pretentious film
students, I’m talking about you!!).
So I heard that the plot for the
first film went something like this: spring break at a lake, some divers
discover an underwater cave with prehistoric badass piranha eggs, girls in bikinis
get naked, the piranhas hatch and attack every thing moving, lots of gore, Ving
Rhames being a badass!
So I’m expecting boobs, gore,
comedy, and generally a fun movie which won’t take itself seriously. And I should add that I am reviewing the 2D
version of the film.
Plot: the film opens with a fake
news broadcast highlight the events of the first film a year ago, and asking
where the piranhas will appear next. Marine biologist Maddy (Danielle
Panabaker) returns to her home town to discover her stepfather Chet (David
Koechner) is planning to open an adult themed water park called ‘The Big Wet’.
So that explains the naked ladies. However the piranhas have spawned in the
local lake which the park pumps in its water, and thanks to some exposition
from Christopher Lloyd’s mad marine biologist, we discover that the piranhas can
swim up pipes and will no doubt attack the water park on its opening day. Oh
yeh, it has David Hasselhoff as the park’s celebrity lifeguard to save the day
from the piranhas.
Does this film sound serious to
you? Because it’s just a fun ride! It’s
often predictable, over the top and just silly. The formula of ‘teens about to
/ having sex will die in a nasty fashion’ is here but we also have a love triangle
between Maddy, her old flame Kyle (Chris Zylka) who’s now a crooked cop and
Barry (Mat Bush), a dorky water park employee who’s handy with a trident. Makes
you wonder who’s going to get the girl and what their going to do with their
trident…
Unlike its predecessor, this film
was shot entirely in 3D and I would have liked to have seen that version. This
film is littered with gimmicky shots designed to poke your eyes out, but I
would have definitely enjoyed a more immersive viewing experience, especially
with the gore.
Speaking of which, this film is
brutal and doesn’t hold back but is very much in the vein of Itchy and Scratchy
cartoons. But with added boobies. Some moments made me laugh out loud and it
pulls no punches, especially in the scene where a character looses her virginity,
and the man looses, well, just watch it.
As for the humour there are some terrific
one liners from various characters, especially from one Mr David Hasselhoff.
This film plays up his character and the legend that he is and he has the
majority of the films scene stealing moments my favourite being when a kid
thinks he’s a real lifeguard.
But he is not the only actor who
has surprise cameos. Gary Busey is hilarious in the films opening and
Christopher Lloyd is great with his obsession with his YouTube hits and his
theories on walking piranhas. Ving Rhames returns briefly for a scene which is reminiscent
of Planet Terror (2007) and had me in stitches with just how bad ass he is.
Director John Gulager must have had so much fun making
this film and was inspired by the sort of video nasties that I used to watch as
a child featuring minimal plot, wooden acting and buckets of cheese and gore.
One plus of the film is how it builds suspense. We all know these characters are two dimensional
and mainly just fodder, but there are a few times in this film where I was
sucked in and hoping said character
would survive. The soundtrack consisting of shrieking violins also helped to
build the suspense but still remained cheesy and fun.
The cinematography (minus some excellent use of slow
motion) and every other technical aspects of this film are generic, but I am
not going to be as critical as I am towards the next Paul Thomas Anderson film
(which I can’t wait for!). However my main issue with this film is the short
runtime. It ended at the 68 minute mark, and had 8 minutes of bloopers, deleted
scenes and a mini music video before the credits!
The film’s opening is great and the pace is good
until the love triangle develops and slows things down. But then slams back
into gear once Christopher Lloyd and Ving Rhames appear, and the last 20
minutes is carnage which is a joy to watch. And as tradition in these kinds of
horror films: it sets up part three.
The DVD title screen has the films poster model with
a montage of the film reflected in her glasses. It features hot naked girls and
the Hoff, but spoils the whole film!
Dolby 5.1 is standard but I didn't notice it much. We
have feature commentary by director John
Gulager, producer Joel Soisson and co-writer Marcus Dunsten. I’m not a fan of
commentaries, but can imagine this would be fun.
‘Behind the DD’ is a brief making of featurette
which basically shows you how much fun they had making this film, but spoils
the whole movie.
One extra that I think should be on every DVD is ‘The Hofftastic World of
David Hasslehoff’. Here we have another
brief documentary
but focusing entirely on the Hoff! He just lampoons his image, himself, and the
religion of the Hoff and you get to hear him say ‘wanker’.
‘Wet and wild with David Koechner’ shows goofy interviews intercut with
film clips and behind the scenes footage.
The funny and random short 'A Lesson with John McEnroe' is included and
is worth a watch.
We also get two short deleted scenes and ‘Busey’s bloopers’ which prove
he's crazy but hilarious, and some trailers.
Ultimately
it’s a great Saturday night film which is homage to Troma and other trash
cinema before it. Turn your brain off. This is an enjoyably silly and fun ride.
With fish.
6 out of 10
If you like this try:
Tremors (1990)
Snakes on a Plane (2006)
Planet Terror (2007)
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